You might be wondering how the U.S. became the greatest country in the history of the world. Let me enlighten you.
Once upon a time there was a man named George Washington. He was our very first President. Now George knew that as President it was his job to solve all the problems of unwashed masses. It was also his job to run the economy and the health care system and the college loan system and the environment and the...well, you get the idea.
In his first speech to the ceremonial congress, because I mean c'mon George made the laws, he proposed heavy regulations, heavy taxes, more freebies to lull the masses and a new department to control all those crazies who actually supported the constitution. Ha ha, what dopes! He also took a few minutes to rail against the rich. He waxed eloquent as he excoriated anyone who built a successful business and hired people. Everyone knows that it's government that creates jobs not the private sector. The rich, aka small business owners, were almost as big of dopes as those constitution lovers.
He also spoke of the dire need to constantly poke America's nose into every country's business around the world. "If America won't be the policeman of the world then who will be?!!" he roared as he pounded the podium with both fists. He received a long standing ovation for that soundbite heard around the world. That was the screaming headline on every media outlet, all tightly controlled by the president of course.
He smiled his big, wooden smile as he shook hands and backslapped all his cronies on his way out, stepped into his stretch carriage as his security team held back the peasants and he cruised to his luxury mansion.
It was a perfect start towards building a strong, successful nation of free people that was every bit as exceptional as Cuba, North Korea and Venezuela. Now you know the rest of the story.
Chanon
Once upon a time there was a man named George Washington. He was our very first President. Now George knew that as President it was his job to solve all the problems of unwashed masses. It was also his job to run the economy and the health care system and the college loan system and the environment and the...well, you get the idea.
In his first speech to the ceremonial congress, because I mean c'mon George made the laws, he proposed heavy regulations, heavy taxes, more freebies to lull the masses and a new department to control all those crazies who actually supported the constitution. Ha ha, what dopes! He also took a few minutes to rail against the rich. He waxed eloquent as he excoriated anyone who built a successful business and hired people. Everyone knows that it's government that creates jobs not the private sector. The rich, aka small business owners, were almost as big of dopes as those constitution lovers.
He also spoke of the dire need to constantly poke America's nose into every country's business around the world. "If America won't be the policeman of the world then who will be?!!" he roared as he pounded the podium with both fists. He received a long standing ovation for that soundbite heard around the world. That was the screaming headline on every media outlet, all tightly controlled by the president of course.
He smiled his big, wooden smile as he shook hands and backslapped all his cronies on his way out, stepped into his stretch carriage as his security team held back the peasants and he cruised to his luxury mansion.
It was a perfect start towards building a strong, successful nation of free people that was every bit as exceptional as Cuba, North Korea and Venezuela. Now you know the rest of the story.
Chanon
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